Thursday, September 3, 2009

When it comes to Condoms

This morning as I cleaned the kitchen floor, I danced around with the mop singing along with Pink as her Funhouse CD blasted through my house. Little Lucy Lou was busily barking at the mop, or it could have been my singing. Whichever it was she was having as good a time as I was. Truly a good time. Music set the tone for this love fest I was having with clean and I was embracing it. Getting immersed in music and lyrics is an escape I have long enjoyed. And in doing so my kiddos have picked up on some racy lyrics from time to time.

Just picture this, Levi riding his bike, then still fitted with training wheels, round and round our cul-de-sac singing his little heart out..."That party last night was awfully crazy I wish we taped. I danced my ass off and had this one girl completely naked..." I don't tend to buy edited music CDs, I like to hear the music with all the profanity and raw emotion the artist intended. Go ahead, start the eye rolling and threaten to not let your kiddos come over and play. If you keep your promise not to send your kiddos to my house I will go right now and fill up my iPod with all kinds of inappropriate music. Pinky swear?

My indulgent attitude toward music coupled with arguably inappropriate for young ears lyrics has lead to some interesting questions. On a quick trip to the market for a gallon of milk Kalvin turns down the radio, which in my car is a no-no. I like my music loud, very loud. The reason being that if the music is loud enough I can sing at the top of my lungs and not even I can hear how bad I sound. Listening to music without singing along is something I have yet to master. So I do often restrain from listening to my iPod at the gym. So when the volume is decreased while I am mid song it had better be important.

This was Kalvin's time to ask a pertinent question. One regarding a burning topic. "Mom what is a condom?" I was flustered, unable to answer for a brief moment. Taken aback by the young mind that was inquiring about sexual things. My mind was turning, rather quickly about how to answer this serious inquisition. He had just heard this lyric "...when it comes to condoms put two on..." So Asher Roth feels the need to provide sex education in his songs, or are they raps? Whichever, I had my 11 year old asking me about condoms, in the car, while we were driving to pick up milk, and I was a little stumped. So I answered as best I knew how, while being honest, but without too much detail. All the while I was cursing his dad for not being the receiver of such questions.

I remember coming home from middle school and turning on the television to find an After School Special was about to come on. Do you remember those shows? The ones that talked about topics that parents may be afraid to discuss with their teens so network television created drama filled mini movies to teach teens about the dangers of sex, drug use, and drinking. Since there are no such mini movies now for my kiddos I choose to use explicit music lyrics as a jumping off point for talks about sexual situations and teen angst. Feel free to judge me, you already are. And remember your pinky swear about sending over your kiddos.


  1. Imagine my surprise when my 5 year old son walked by singing "I kissed a girl, and I like it...", or "You spin my head right round, when you go down down down...", or "That girl is so dangerous...", "Just dance, it'll be ok, da, da,da, da..."

  2. I see no need to edit your music. Your taste in music tells your kids (and everyone else in earshot) a lot about who you are. As long as you're prepared to answer their questions about what they're hearing as honestly as possible, that's what matters. Music, art and literature are excellent conversation starters and a great way to connect with our kids. It is too bad, though, that Dad didn't get the condom question. Just to even it out, maybe he'll get one about tampons ;)

  3. I'm with ya on the music. People are always so surprised that I don't buy edited music. No harm to the kiddos.

  4. I admit I do not listen to music with swear words in it when my kids are around. But then they are four and one so they are that really cute repeating stage - only it is not so cute when they repeat Oh Sh*% However, I do not shy away from anything that allows conversations like these to start and I will have to remember this post when they are just a little older and want to listen to the radio.

  5. I will be sending my girls to your house, and then you can talk to Delma about her "bagina" so I don't have to.

  6. I *so* remember the after-school specials! :)

    I know I'll be half ROFLMAO/half mortified the day I hear my 10yo singing "S is for the simple need, E is for the ecstacy, X is just to mark the spot cuz that's the one you really want."

    Love it!